Lawrence and all interested, I have been giving more space to your questions
over the past couple of days. I always work in a model of loving connection
and do not anymore use the idea of entanglement but move deeper into the system
to see where there is a need for behavior to link a person to a forgotten
ancestor or a trauma that has been unhealed.
To apply this to a situation with a student, it seems to me we would need to
look lovingly at the persons and circumstances that are hidden. Historically
there may have been a need not to see. These are common in many situations
where the father cannot be seen due to culture or rape or other life
circumstances. Allowing seeing of these unseen ancestors may foster a link to
valuing education.
I have an example to make is more clear. A woman in an ancestral line of
mothers was raped by a foreign soldier. The father was never discussed. The
only thing the descendants knew was he was not to be allowed into the family
system as a conscious awareness. The unconscious awareness in the line of
women only knew the violence of the rape and as generations passed, the mothers
'remembered' him in being violent with their children. When he is added to the
constellation in the systemic field, the children no longer have a need to be
violent but can choose another means of remembering him. A cultural motif, a
study of his culture, that kind of thing.
I wonder if in some circumstances, children are only able to fail because that
is the only way an ancestral father is remembered. If you can set up all those
who have been unseen in the child's line, even if you just set it up with
stones or mats, then perhaps the child will not need to "fail" as the only way
of remembering. An exercise might be to allow all the unseen to be present and
to be seen fully, and brought from the unconscious to the conscious awareness.
Perhaps lighting a candle or some other very simple ceremony might allow them
to be seen with loving eyes.
I hope this at least gives you some ideas. I am happy to have this thread.
Has anyone else some ideas to offer? Sometimes the simplest idea can open a
huge window! If we allow these little ideas to just be in the field, sometimes
we find wisdom.
Much love to all, Anni
systemic variables http://www.systemicvariables.com/
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