Dear Helen & the rest of the Constellation group involved in this discussion
Thank you to everyone for the really interesting input to this important and
fascinating topic. I have taken a little while to think about how I wanted to
reply to your query Helen and decided that I wanted to offer myself as a kind
of case study in this area. I am now 8 weeks pregnant with a child from a egg
donor (a very close friend) + my husband. I attended a constellation workshop
(before I fell pregnant) and unexpectedly encountered some negative opinions &
attitudes from the facilitator about the idea of egg/sperm donation. I had
wanted to do a constellation to see if there was any energetic block to us
falling pregnant. As we proceeded through the interview the facilitator said
that 'you had better not do it' because in their experience children from such
a process only had a lot of difficulty coming to terms with that. At that
point in the interview I began to feel very uncomfortable (I felt judged & that
the facilitator wasn't neutral/open) & mutually we chose not to continue with
the constellation.
I was a little shaken by the experience, but it didn't change the decision my
husband I had made to continue in our attempts to have this child. If
anything, it made me more determined & confident in our decision that if any
child were to come from this process it would be born out of love & tremendous
generosity. Perhaps that experience, as confronting as it was, made a
difference because within the next week we did the next embryo transfer (it was
the 6th attempt) & that is the one that has worked. Who knows. I am just
trusting of the process we have been through.
We already have a 2 year old daughter (my biological child - my last 'good'
egg!) and my friend who has donated her eggs to us has 2 daughters also. We
are chosing to be open with our children, friends & family about the egg
donation & the process we have been through. This child will know who it
belongs to, where it comes from and have open and close contact with the ½
sisters and my friend who is the biological mother. This openness cannot
guarantee against any future 'problems' or issues for the child, but I know
that we will all be loving & supportive through any issue or situation, as we
would be for any of our children.
I guess in speaking to those of you who are working with clients who have
fertility/infertility issues and are considering or have had egg/sperm
donation, I would like to say that the most important thing is to be
open-minded and non-judgemental. You are doing incredibly worthwhile work.
It is a deeply personal journey for the people involved. They may make
decisions that from the outside may be difficult to understand or agree with.
As ivf and fertility treatment is becoming more affordable and available,
things such as egg/sperm donation will become more widespread and I imagine
more people will seek constellation work as a way to process and understand
their experiences. I feel it has huge potential for good with these issues.
Thank you again for opening this topic for discussion and I hope my input has
been helpful.
Regards
Sabine Simmonds
Senior Consultant
Level 5, 77 Berry Street
North Sydney NSW 2060
P: (02) 8912 3430
W: http://www.zaffyre.com<http://www.zaffyre.com/>
Sabine Simmonds
Senior Consultant
Level 5, 77 Berry Street
North Sydney NSW 2060
P: (02) 8912 3430
W: http://www.zaffyre.com<http://www.zaffyre.com/>
From: ConstellationTalk@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
[mailto:ConstellationTalk@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx] On Behalf Of Lene E
Sent: Tuesday, 22 February 2011 9:14 PM
To: ConstellationTalk@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Subject: [ConstellationTalk] Do you have experiences on Inexplicable Lack of
Fertility and Constellation Work?
Dear you!
I am new in this group, and I hope you will support me in getting started.
Introduction
I would like to introduce myself. I am a Danish coach and therapist with
background within gestalt therapy, NLP, hypnosis, the Enneagram and other
energetic methods. I am originally educated a food scientist. I have
received systemic constellation training from Albrecht Mahr, Ursula Franke,
Tom Bryson and Liv Danhyo.
Fertility Area
I have specialized within the fertility area, and I am very interested in
applying constellation work on helping Danes reaching their dream of having
a child. It might seem controversial to some of you, but these people
suffers a lot and they are in great pain. I have a feeling that this tool
can be really helpful and save them a great amount of money on the costly
fertility treatments. I think the tool and understanding The Order of Love
will be beneficial both to the parents and to their future children.
Questions
Have you done any constellationwork on issues related to Lack of fertility?
Or on donor-issues? Donor-children?
Do you know of anybodyelse who has?
Do you know of books or publications that describe application of
constellationwork on this area?
If you are interested, I will be happy to share my experiences and results,
when I have gone futher into this field. Just let me know if you are
interested.
Thank you so much in advance!!
Best regards,
Lene Eriksen
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