The smile is of the gradations of lightness into darkness...darkness into
lightness...the continuum of presence as it is blended ito and is blended by
absence...ad ank dr joe
On Oct 29, 2010, at 9:33 PM, David Mathes wrote:
Thanks to all for the great posts on this topic.
Also, I find what you write, Sheila, very helpful and accepting.
If people say in their Constellation interview that they have a condition
that could have a Mental health diagnosis I often ask if they have had a
diagnosis.
This in itself can be quite revealing as some clients say something like.
"yes, but I don't agree with it". Once I had a client who said he didn't
agree with his Psychiatrist's diagnosis of Bi-Polar, which he said he later
'dis-proved' to the doctor. The issue he brought to Constellations was
inability to keep a job. His Constellation revealed him being bigger than his
bosses and bigger than his father.
I suppose like anything, a diagnosis is just a diagnosis and has its place.
I imagine that many of those who come to Constellation workshops are
depressed in some way. From my own experiences depression is dark, without
much sense of future, and very disconnected.
When I heard a therapist say at a conference years ago that depression was
part of life's natural cycle, that made me feel better! I suppose that
systemically he just included depression as part of my system, something I
did not have to fight with anymore, or feel down just because I felt down.
Turning to some generalisations about depression in Constellations...
From those who say they are depressed in their interview, in the way they
present and in their Constellation, these are some noticings.
Feeling weighed down or a sense of darkness, and the blanket as others have
mentioned. Also coldness.
If we think in terms of Family Constellations, often when representatives
turn to the future they look out of a window, or see light or brightness, so
darkness often is the opposite, looking back or down, or standing in an
obscured position. The looking back or down is often trying to carry
something for others, but could be standing in the 'right' position, e.g.
'daughter'. The obscuration can be standing behind parents. ie, standing out
of position.
'Carrying something' can lead to feeling depressed but in my experience there
can broadly be two aspects here. 1) Carrying something for others and 2)
carrying something for ourselves, but the latter is not recognised by the
ancestors as they were not able to do the same, recognition of this by the
ancestors seems to lift the depression and help love flow again.
And lastly depression can be a link to something or someone lost in the
family, in that way it is a signpost.
The overall thought I have is that depression is linked to an issue of
connection. But of course dark, cold and heavy does not have to mean
'depressed', just a 'light' does not have to equate to 'not depressed'.
I end with this. As I ran the other day after reading some of the posts on
this subject, this poem came to me: -
I turn
Drawn to the dark, to the blackness
Where some fear
What they might see
The dark is everything
After a while
The blackness sees me
It smiles
I smile
It says ‘thank you’
I say ‘thank you’
I realize
I came from there
So far back
I turn
Slowly
And see the light
I stand between
Connected to both
I look behind me
It is always there
I step forward
It smiles more
David Mathes
www.innersuccess.net.au
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