dear group,
i haven't posted very much recently, but still read the group. i have found
some of the latterly discussions very interesting and informative from a
constellation point of view, and appreciate the diversity of wisdom experience
and opinion on this forum.
i also have really appreciated thomas energy and erudition on this forum. i
find his humour a little adolescent to my particular fancies at times, but he
has amply explained why this is so, by dint of asperger's and his long term
job. any humour that is not to my taste is more than ameliorated, in my
estimation, by the contribution thomas makes to the group, in his courage to
approach perhaps slightly taboo topics with intelligence and often quite
penetrating insight, and in his willingness to examine his own process, both
within and without the constellation setting. what more could we ask from a
group member of this little system?
i find it more worrying that various people within this system have set
themselves up as representatives of an establishment that needs to censor
humour that is not to the taste of everybody, and not only the humour but the
person injecting what is - to me - a vital ingredient in life and systems in
general - the ability to ask questions of ourselves, to point out how we
obscure our own freedoms sometimes with slavishness to a doctrine or ideology
of another at the expense of the truth standing there within the circle. not
all remarks of a jester in a group are valid, but the right to make those is
infinitely so, for they force us to examine and really look at the emperor's in
our middle.
so please, i would ask, out of respect for the health and integrity of our own
system, and out of respect of what is truth and what is intelligent and
disparate comment within the humour of thomas' observations, can we allow and
tolerate and even enjoy the diversity of his contributions, without feeling
compelled to silence or cut him out of our little cyber constellation.
love to all
sarah
--- In ConstellationTalk@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx, EJ52@A... wrote:
Dear Thomas,
I think you have been representing Jesse James, a constellator from the_____________________
midwest of America, whose work is well known. I believe his Family
Constellations with Cole Younger and Frank Dalton to be the best ever
recorded. He also was a chronicler of train traffic and small town banks. A
major difference between you two is that he did not know Eddie Z.
Ed
Dear Ed,
Wow, what an eye- and heart-opening response! I was convinced that I was
representing someone still alive, but now you make me realize that I had been
excluding the dead ones. Shame on me. And Duh! Here I am posturing during the
month of November, when the Dead Ones are to be celebrated, and I fail to
consider that I might be representing one of their ilk.
And with the offering of Jesse James, that inspires me to create an old
fashioned Wild West wanted poster.
___________________________________________
WANTED: DEAD OR ALIVE!!!
The person Thomas is representing
in his cyber-constellation
_____________________________
I'm also very heartened by the Jesse James attribution as you touch upon the
systemic dynamics of robbery. Stealing in any form seems to be an expression
of an interrupted movement in taking what the parents have to give. In adult
life, this can manifest as a deeply unconscious sense of entitlement where
someone takes from the public treasure house of society what could not be
taken easily from Mom and Dad. It may also be that the robber on the lam then
carries the guilt of the parents as his own even after he is captured and put
away in the pen.
I may not be robbing physical banks in this lifetime, but as for "soul banks?"
That's worthy of a full FC.
Now, Ed, as a reward for putting forth a candidate for me, I have conjured up
a nickname for you, a proper sobriquet that will express your (systemic?)
essence --- at least as far as I know you, which is not much right now.
However, what first came to mind was:
Easy Eddie Lynch
mainly because of the ease with which you work with the dead ones in
constellations. However an extended name also came up.
Over Easy Eddie Lynch
I'll let you decide which is more fitting and when I get to know you more,
perhaps a new and improved name may emerge.
I'm also so glad that you got to know Eddie Z. in Portland. And by the way,
for the benefit of all you CT members out there, Edward Zawidowski told me
specifically that if I did not refer to him as Uncle Eddie on the CT forum, he
would feel insulted.
However, I was moved to change his name from Uncle Eddie to a more fitting
Fast Eddie.
At our first training session, we were discussing the CT "flap" over my
references to Uncle Bert, etc., which were judged disrespectful and offended
several people here. While I do feel sorry for offending those people and I
even feel the need to apologize to them, I also have to realize that we are
facilitators in training here, and we need to go beyond personal sympathies
and antipathies brought up by each other.
So, my fellow CT colleagues: I honestly did not consciously intend to insult
or show disrespect to Bert Hellinger. Over the last three months, I have
become conscious of a lot of the perp energy I have been carrying, and much of
that due to my "constellation twin" Stefan Bajon, who expressed great insight
into my situation in his recent post.
(Stefan and I have represented each other and each other's family members
(even each other's bodies fer Chrissake!) in many constellations here in L.A.
so I'm happy that he can act as a real grounding kind of older brother figure
for me when I get too rambunctious on this forum.)
At any rate, I do apologize to all on the list who may have been offended by
my Frank Farrelly type references to Bert. And thank you Over Easy Eddie for
smoothing the way this morning for me to discharge a lot of this tension
hanging in the cyber-air.
Thomas
PS Perhaps you may gain some insight into my character or lack of it, if you
realize that I have been a high school teacher of math and physics. Just
imagine being locked up in a room for an hour with 25 teenagers and your job
is to get them to do what they don't really want to do. And you are trapped
inside together until the bell rings. That may possibly explain why my
"threshold of disrespect" may be a lot higher than the normal. I mean if you
want to be an MD, you have to be able to overcome the natural recoiling
emotions related to blood, gore and broken bodies. Similarly, high school
teachers develop an analogous immunity to insults, name-calling and other
joyous expressions of raging adolescence. I have to realize that I am now in
a cyber classroom of sorts with adults where I am representing my own
systemically arrested adolescence, not to mention the Catholic Church as
Stefan points out so deftly.
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