Some further thoughts about the obesity constellation in relation to trauma
theory:
An extra complication in this situation was the shame experienced by this
representative for being overwhelmed and having to be withdrawn from the
constellation. So in order for this experience to be healing for this
representative, the shame had to be addressed as well.
I suspect that shame is common complication of the trauma system in humans. So
I have been thinking about how to distinguish shame from the trauma responses
described by Bertold as well as distinguishing it from looking down at a dead
person in a constellation.
First the shame has to be identified. In this case it was easy as the
representative clearly stated it. Shame also has physical manifestations. In
its clearest form it includes
hanging of the head and slumping of the shoulders, which can be confused with
looking at a dead person lying on the floor, in a constellation. There is also
aversion of gaze and going red in the face as well as a loss of physical
coordination or clumsiness. These physical signs help distinguish shame from
looking down at a dead person.
Another feature of shame is cognitive shock, whereby a person's thought
processes become cloudy and slow. The clumsiness and cognitive shock can
compound the shame as the person often then feels inadequate and "pathetic"
as a result of that. So the shame can then toxically spiral downward. This can
look like the freezing that Bertold describes as arising from fear........but
it is subjectively very different.
Repair of shame is more about helping the person to feel a sense of connection
including that they are valued and accepted. Again this is subtly different
from the sense of
safety that needs to be established when traumatised. You know you are well on
the way to repair of shame when comfortable eye contact can be established.
If anyone else has any other thoughts on this theme I would be very interested
to hear.
hasta la vista
Chris Walsh
An Australian Constellation Website:
www.constellationflow.com
