Dear Gail
(and all other colleagues from the CT)
I promised to come back to you later with an answer, it took a while for I
have been busy. But now I have made some time for it.
I was trained as a physiotherapist and sometimes later I learned metaphysics
too. (Alice Baily has written down beautiful books about metaphysics, and
they are translated in many languages. They are a bit hard to understand at
first, so I was very happy with my teacher who helped me to understand it
better.) My teachers famous first words were: Before we begin we have to
understand death and sexuality, only then we can begin to grow. I never
forgot that, and she was completely right, as long as we are still confused
about these issues we cant get clear on any other aspect. Constellation work
has taught me so much about death and has helped me to understand more about
life and staying clear.
Although I had learned and understood a lot in these days about the soul and
the spirit, the main thing that my clients needed was very simple: to find
out if a problem, disease or pain was physical, emotional or mental. That
gave them enough clarity to go on with their lives. As a therapist I am
aware of the fact that these three levels need a different approach. It
would be too much to describe this fully, but with some short examples I
will give it a try.
You understand yourself better if you realise that you only suffer from a
MENTAL IDEA, like "my mother was not good enough'. One of the solutions is
to look at this idea closely and see if it is true, the whole truth and
'nothing but the truth' Then you smile about your misunderstandings and just
love your mother.
If you suffer from an EMOTION like sadness it is usually a secondary emotion
(Because primary emotions go away after some time by themselves and
therefore you don't need help or therapy for them. Life takes care of them)
Then it helps to ask yourself: 'Where in my body do I feel this" Go to this
place and listen what your body has to tell you about it. Then you can feel
the primary emotion underneath it and look at the logical reason for that
emotion, eg fear because something threatening like an anaesthesia has
happened to you when you were two months old. Allow the fear to come up and
breathe it out, update your age (usually this is an old emotion from the
time you were still very young) and continue your life with love. If it is
an emotion that you have taken over from someone else then a constellation
or another way of systemic work is a wonderful help to see that you never
help someone by being loyal to their feelings, it only burdens them more. If
you don't want that then you let go and honour their fate.
If you suffer from a PHYSICAL problem, you need to listen to what your body
needs and every now and then give in to that. So often we burden our body
with ideas of how it should be or we are basically unfair to our body. Or we
abuse our body by holding on to an old emotion for a long time. My favourite
sentence in my practise was when a client complained about having problems
with her back: do you have problems with your back or does your back have
problems with you? And sometimes you need a skilful therapist to help you
understand what your body needs, if it is a long-lasting and complicated
imbalance.
When these three levels are more clear and less confused, then the voice of
the SOUL can be heard more clearly. We know this from the expression: 'deep
in my heart I know that .' There is never doubt in your heart when you
listen to the soul.
So when the magical world of constellations came into my life, I was very
happy with this instrument that made the soul so tangible, visible, audible.
Like the grass or the trees can make the wind visible. I have learned so
much about life by listening and looking to what the soul showed us in all
these constellations.
I don't work as a physical therapist anymore, but when I do constellations
or systemic consultations these three levels - body, emotion and mental -
are dealt with first, before we go on with the systemic work. This saves a
lot of time and confusion.
I hope I have answered your question the way you wanted it
Kind regards and all the best
Margreet Mossel
www.opstellingen.com <http://www.opstellingen.com/>
Van: ConstellationTalk@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
[mailto:ConstellationTalk@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx] Namens Gail
Verzonden: woensdag 7 maart 2007 1:38
Aan: ConstellationTalk@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Onderwerp: [ConstellationTalk] Re: Energy in the family field
Thank you Margaret,
Yes I am still struggling with definitions and am sometimes imprecise in the
applications of words to phenomenology. I do agree that more
precision helps us to share, learn and agree about what we observe. Although
it can be tricky when we talk about something so large with
many people experiencing different facets of it.
When I used the term "family soul" I was applying it to something I feel in
the field. It is something that binds the family together, it
forbids and permits, and involves blind loyalty rather than conscious love.
It's purpose seems to be about protection and survival, and in
the service of these goals it is prepared to sacrifice anything necessary,
including the wellbeing of family members, truth and other
qualities which we regard as noble. As the struggle for survival gets
harder, this also gets harder. Ahh...perhaps I am talking about the
family conscience.
Could you share an example of a problem that stems from emotional or other
issues compared to a problem with systemic roots.
Gail
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