You make some interesting observations Hania. I agree with you that the
experience of the group can uncover all kinds of insights that individual
sessions might not. And yet, many amazing things can also happen in an
individual session. People's reasons for not wanting to attend a workshop
are also complex. I agree with you that family conscience and loyalty play
their part. Also it is hard for someone who has not been to know what the
benefits could be if they did go!
In terms of Bert Hellinger turning people away, I think this also has to be
understood at many different levels. When he was last in London, 4 or 5
years ago I watched him turn one woman away twice and on the third time he
worked with her. What happened between him and her in that time? As an
observer I have no way of knowing and yet something much have shifted. I
also saw another woman talk herself into not working with him without him
opening his mouth at all. She acknowledged privately afterwards that she
had done something to herself in that process. So I try to keep an open
mind and heart on these things. I think what happens is multi-layered and
it is hard to tell from an observer's position exactly what has gone on
between facilitator and client.
Barbara
On 19 January 2013 03:07, Hania Gorski <haniagorski@xxxxxxxxx> wrote:
Hi Barbara and All
You wrote: "My experience generally is that those who come for individual
work are a different population from those who attend workshops."
I'd like to share my modest experience from last year - observing my few
long term clients in my individual counselling practice (long term because
of complex trauma or transgenerational trauma or other complex and chronic
issues, not because I prefer it, in contrary I prefer what is efficient and
short).
Few of them attended one group workshop, some of them did a constellation,
some just participated (also as representatives).
One of a common characteristic of these clients was that they all were very
reserved about exposing themselves in a group setting and extremely
sensitive about "what other'd think" which is very obvious if we see
dysfunctional family systems messages to family members "don't feel, don't
see, don't talk about it".
And that - in general - is our common problem in applying any form of
therapy or in applying SCW, and much effort needed to build a trust in
order to lower such resistance in process, to make a space to change
happening.
What I observe in the long term process of working with these clients who
were exposed to SCW group workshop
(and they have continued individual therapy with me after) - there are some
shifts in their internal and external perception which is followed by much
deeper processing of their issues. It'd be hard to say specifically what it
is but it is something like a feature of a deep experience of a
beyond-intellect insight in an universal laws of family system functioning,
and this is only possible in such depth and intensity of experience - in my
understanding - by EXPERIENCING these Orders of Love in a group workshop.
Saying that I don't underestimate SCW in individual sessions, but that
space of group and other people experiences is much richer in going beyond
of habitual resistances.
And in my opinion - the issues of exposure in a group SCW are not only
cultural or national; they come always at the first instance - from family
system/parents allowance.
And sadly - those who have bigger restrictions - are usually in a bigger
need of resolution of entanglements
Because of that - many people wouldn't benefit a lot from only simple
attending a workshop; the internalised and unconscious shame and fear would
block their ability to tune to the Knowing Field.
That makes me feel sad when I've heard Bert or others sometimes stating
something like there is no help for those who have too high resistance
(that was my impression when I observed Bert rejecting working with some
people). That's an act of exclusion.
I'm simplifying. That way - someone might say - the evolution works (and
the Orders of Love state it by the way of family system conscience works),
eliminating those who have not enough power/determination to break through
obstacles.
But that makes me feel rebellious; not to deny obvious "conscience made"
obstacles but to not give up when some people have such obstacles that they
need more work in individual process.
I have a lot of respect to the fact of so called "heavy fate" and to the
truth that we need to step out if someone is not ready, or that we need to
respect if the family unconscious loyalty would take charge and the client
wouldn't chose Life but Death (for example).
In result of being exposed to experience SCW in a group setting - my
clients present shifts in their consciousness which I may describe (however
is not very precise) as stepping a bit out of the invisible cloud of their
family system entanglements; they present their insights or changes in
functioning as less self-centered (in terms of taking things too
personally, being stuck in unmet early childhood developmental needs).
Stating this I feel that my language of description is poor but I'm aware
that these phenomena (like many phenomena of SCW) are deeper than
intellectual semantics. Still, language is necessary to communicate.
In the end - regarding your observation Barbara that there are different
people attending workshops and individual therapy - I've been observing
that there are few types of clients (in a rough division - depending of
what are their goals): some who seek self development only, some who come
from working on some present life issues, some seeking freedom from being
haunted by their past, some who don't know why they have some obstacles in
their life as nothing from their experience would explain that, and some
people with chronic health (or mental health) issues in their individual
life or family, issues with children etc I'm sure I didn't fulfill all
possible cathegories.
I think - when we discuss issues of who attends workshops and why - it'd be
also important to see what types of clients we have, and how SCW could be a
part of their other therapeutic processes. That could help us to understand
what kind of service to people we might be in.
When I see these "invisible" phenomena of simple exposure to a group
workshop affecting my clients in a long term therapy - I see again and
again how invaluable is SCW.
From the other hand - with these clients I couldn't get results doing only
SCW, as their way to open up and reach out of their restrictions made by
family system, is very difficult.
Thanks
Hania Gorski, M.Psych.*, *Melbourne
***The world, Ive come to think, is like the surface of a frozen lake. We
walk along, we slip, we try to keep our balance and not to fall. One day,
theres a crack, and so we learn that underneath us is an unimaginable
depth. *James Joyce **
On 19 January 2013 04:22, Barbara Morgan <theknowingfield@xxxxxxxxx>
wrote:
Thanks Stephen. Yes, finding others to fill your workshops for you is athose
wonderful asset I find. Interesting that you sometimes draw people for
individual work from your workshops. My experience generally is that
who come for individual work are a different population from those whoall
attend workshops. There is a bit of overlap but not much.
BW
Barbara
On 14 January 2013 02:37, Stephen Campbell <coachuno@xxxxxxxxx> wrote:
**its
Dear Barbara and colleagues,
Thank you for your note. Yes, I strongly believe that the "culture" and
attendant "languages" are most important to take in consideration in
workshopsaspects of a workshop.
From my own experience when I was doing NLP and Neuro-Semantics
phonewhile still working and living in the US was that there is a hugeevent.
difference between getting people in the door and working with them. A
workshop, even my three hour evening workshops here in Peru, are an
Organizing an event which includes the publicity, the answering the
theintelligently when they call with questions, the finding the locale andall
the logistics involved in insuring that the participant`s logistical
experience is first class is a completely different kettle of fish than
their experience in and of the workshop per se.
This distinction is of primer importance in the overall experience of
theparticipant/client/patient. And, will make the difference in theindividual
returning for another workshop experience or not. The mindset and modus
operandi of the event planner and manager is diametrically opposed to
tofacilitator of the workshop.
In an effort to maximize our "take home" from the workshop we attempt
natureplay a role in both camps. Some of us may be successful, others not so.My
own experience is that I am "good" at both. I am a salesperson by
theseso enrolling people in my workshops was never an issue. However, Ilearned
that there others out there who are far better and are set up to do allfor
that needs to be done to get a goodly number of folks sitting in chairs
which they have paid the agreed upon sum. So, I have stepped awaythe
completely from this aspect of workshop organization. I arrive, create
ambiance, open up the Field and go about doing my work for which I was70%
trained and will be paid.
Reminds me of something a suite mate of mine at university said, "Hire
people to do what you don't do well". This counsel has served me well
through out my life. My other cardinal rule is that I would rather have
of something than 100% of nothing. So, I cede to those who either have
client bases who can use my service or know how to better enroll people
than I. What I "take home" is just recompense for my work and the
"organizers" all seem to be happy with their remuneration for their
efforts. Moreover, I get a fair number of individual sessions from
on/withworkshops; because, as you all so well know, we can not work witheveryone
who attends a workshop. So, if people see the effect of the work
forothers they contact me for individual sessions. In all my introductionsand
closing remarks of a workshop I make it known that I do individual workand
have name cards available for those who want them at the end of the
workshop. In a recent evening workshop I had 12 participants, average
privatethe early summer and just after the Holidays. I worked with three
individuals during the workshop and I now have four inquiries for
culturessessions.practice.
Perhaps this is a model you might want to consider to expand your
very
Fondly,
Stephen
On Fri, Jan 11, 2013 at 1:45 PM, Barbara Morgan
theknowingfield@xxxxxxxxx>wrote:
Interesting to hear your experience Stephen. Thank you. Having run an
apprenticeship for many years, which I have found very helpful and a
good way for people to learn, I am about to set up an apprenticeship
training here in the Uk and it is useful to hear what works and what
doesn't. I am becoming increasingly aware also that different
differentneed
different things and I guess also different individuals need
whilstthings too at any given time, which is why I firmly believe that
andit
is important and very useful to have a basic structure for training
thesome things really do need covering, it is also good to respond to
whomfoundgroup and their particular needs for learning. This is what I have
soyour
invaluable in working in Romania over the last few years.
Barbara.
On 2 January 2013 21:20, Stephen Campbell coachuno@xxxxxxxxx> wrote:
**
Dearest Colleagues,
May this year be one of great prosperity in all aspects of each of
lives.
I have found this thread of much interest and like Sheila, with
Iof
resonate, I would like to add my two centavos from the perspective
as aheldbilingual and bicultural Facilitator here in Perú.
I was privileged to be part of the first Facilitator training ever
inyears
this country. Our training was ably managed and coordinated by TiiuBozeman
of the Centro Hellinger de Argentina. Our training spanned over 3.5
of bi-monthly trainings by members of the teaching staff as well
toJust.number of invited teachers such as Stephan Hausner and Anngwyn St
seeWeread
not only learned the theory of this work in a classroom setting, we
extensively and each module included an entire day of workshopfacilitated
by the visiting professor and open to the public at large. Theseworkshops
were amply attended and we got to live and experience the Field andobserve
and learn from true masters. I personally travelled to Argentina to
Bert himself work and teach. Additionally, I travelled to Bernreid
And, Ibe
in
the presence of a wider array of true masters at this craft. All of
which contributed enormously to the Facilitator i have become.
andcontinue to evolve almost on a daily basis as I bring my othertherapeutic
skills to this systemic solution.
Early on in my training, a fellow colleague and physician friend
I,pool
othersover lunch, came to the realization that in order to really become
competent at this craft we could not merely observe the work of
and
read everything we could get our hands on. We had to get in the
as aand
dog paddle if necessary. My dear friend and colleague, who works
weeklyphysician in the national health service, has a private clinic andbecause
of his professional exposure attracted 40-60 attendees to our
threetoworkshops. For well over two years our Friday nights were dedicated
practice,charged alearning and serving the patients who came to our workshops. He
thatvery modest stipend to each person who attended. We have reminisced
our early work, way before we had been given "permission" to
haswasaltering
not the most elegant but it was effective. People resolved life
issues both physical and emotional through our work. Word of mouth
iswholekept his clinic full as he continues. I, on the other hand, beganoffering
workshops at a Healing Center run by dear friends and addressing a
different strata of clients. In the early days it was weekly and it
now
twice to three times per month. Like Bill mentioned, I have had
myconsistencypeople show up and we did meaningful work; while discouraging Imaintained
my consistency of being there every Thursday evening. This
speakshas
paid huge dividends as now my workshops consistently have 15-30centers
participants. I have replicated this model in several other healing
and now do 6-8 workshops per month.The effectiveness of the work
for
itself and the word of mouth ( lip radio as it is know here) keeps
laundrypractice vibrant and my workshops well attended.
As Dan mentioned, some people don't like their soiled family
toand
socio-economicbe
aired in public. This is particularly true of a certain
strata in this country. So, they choose to come to my office for aprivate
session in which I use sheets of paper with the following large
inscription on each 0 ^ 0. This represents the individual\s eyes
thenose
so the client can position them looking in a given direction. In
aconsideredpast,
each sheet had a name of the element I, as the facilitator,
important. Now, other than the sheet which represents the client
him/herself which has their name on it, all the others merely have
Thatsmall
Roman numeral in the bottom right hand corner. This evolving covert
constellation is evolving and producing some astounding results.
inisknown
subject of another future post or article.
About six months ago I had the privilege of working with two well
psychiatrists and three psychologists each individually on issues
sharetheytheir
lives. The results of our work in each case were so fruitful that
have
put me on their respective referral lists and until just before the
holidays I had a waiting list of patients.
The purpose of this post is not to say, "Hey,look at me!" it is
therecurrentthatworkshops.
it is possible to create a vibrant practice and well attended
As
I look back, I see several factors which have contributed to my
status. Consistency is the primary one. Not only did I hang in
personfordeal
the workshops where attendance was minimal and compensationclinic,
equally tenuous; but, for the time I worked at the above mentioned
where I occasionally received taxi fare, I also held workshops to
participants.with
macro issues relating to Peru as a country at no cost to
I
have travelled extensively throughout the country doing workshopsorganized
by others and this too has borne fruit in that I do private in
tosessions as well as through Skype. And in some cases people travel
FieldtheLima,
where I am based, to work with me.
I don't think language per se is the tipping point to well attended
workshops. I have written and let others write, with my oversight,
description of what this work is all about. I speak it of as being
"psychology of the soul" and that captivates many. When I speak of
Field I relate to those times when we have had an intuition aboutsomething
and remark that we are then connected to the Field which is the
areof
all information since the beginning of time. I am sure that there
highlightmany,
perhaps including Dr. Sheldrake, but it works. This work I
isthe
about feeling not about thinking. For some this is HARD but even
havebulwarks cave in once in the Field. Dan, I know that you could havecreated
the success in the Massachusetts Prison System that you did and
minewritten about if language was the issue.
Word of this effective methodology has spread and colleagues of
And,throughout the country who were trained similarly are using this
methodology to help their patients resolve issues they present.
itdone
is
not all bright and sunny as we occasionally have to repair work
byhone
So,professionals who attended but did not complete the full training.
is alimited knowledge and experience can damage do.
So, in conclusion, I do believe that lengthy training and exposure
must. Experience in group dynamics is also a necessary skill to
wordsuchreceives
has been mentioned to provide a safe and loving environment wherecomplete
strangers connect with one and other at such a deep level that they
willingly participate by representing or being the person who
the
contributions of others. I have others organize my workshops and I
compensate them for their efforts. It is a win win for all. And
of
mouth is unbelievably powerful.
I trust that mis dos centavos (two cents) have value to you.
Abrazos to each of you from summery Peru
Stephen
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
--
Barbara Morgan
Family Constellations Trainer, Supervisor & Practitioner
Editor of
The Knowing Field
International Constellations Journal
www.theknowingfield.com
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[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
--
Barbara Morgan
Family Constellations Trainer, Supervisor & Practitioner
Editor of
The Knowing Field
International Constellations Journal
www.theknowingfield.com
[Non-text portions of this message have been removed]
------------------------------------
Yahoo! Groups Links
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