Dear Liz:
Thanks for sharing your insights with love and humbleness, and thanks for
your suggestions too... very valuable!
fondly,
Julio
PS.- about US Conference, I hope to be there next year, and keep on
learning...
2011/8/21 Liz Jelinek <lizjelinek@xxxxxxxxxxx>
**
Julio,that is fascinating that mother and secret were like one. In
Hellinger's Love's Hidden Symmetry he reminds us that women must return to
their mothers, and men to their fathers. Last spring in Germany in
Ulsamer's
group I admitted to feeling like Daddy's girl and he jumped right down my
throat and told me I'd better get straight with my mother and forget about
my relationship with my dad. I didn't like being jumped on like that but
later when I had time to reflect I realized how important that is, and when
you see the video--hopefully tomorrow--you will notice some healing with my
mom.
I'm guess that something is going on with your client--sounds like she sees
dad as a hero and mom not necessarily protecting her.
I can't say for sure, but perhaps a good place to start. Hmmm. Daddy's
girl,
daddy's ship, daddy's officers. Interesting thread--maybe to follow. Fondly
Liz
Julio, are you planning to come to the US conference?
e
-----Original Message-----
From: ConstellationTalk@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
[mailto:ConstellationTalk@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx] On Behalf Of Julio Príncipe
Sent: Sunday, August 21, 2011 11:09 PM
To: ConstellationTalk@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Subject: Re: [ConstellationTalk] about healing and crisis process
(suggestions, please)
Thanks Liz!
In fact, there was a lot of information (and, paradoxically, a lack of
informaton too).
The constellation was setted up in and individual attendance (with sheets
of
papers on the floor).
About the sexual abuse: she shared to me that -when she was a just a girl-
a
subordinate of her father (he was a Naval Officer at a province of the
peruvian jungle) abuse her when she was sleeping (she remember it "fuzzy,
like a dream"). Additional information: Many years ago, two sub-officers
"accidentally died" in mysterious circumstances (also subordinates of their
father); she has noticed about recently.
About positioning: When we put "sadness", it was equal in feelings and
posture as the "mother", and they both has attention put on the same place
of my room. I decide to call it "a painful secret". The "father" was close
to "client position", as a support (feedback of my client).
About resolution: In a point of the work, with visualization, we worked
with
mom&dad and her feelings about being unprotected. At the end, we worked to
give permission to their sons to live with happiness (just that, because
it's another long story about her former husbands, abortions, etc).
Thanks again for your support (to you and al CT-members)
Fondly,
Julio
2011/8/21 Liz Jelinek <lizjelinek@xxxxxxxxxxx>
**Spanish!
Julio, your English is just finemuch better than my non-existent
Although my two little grandchildren speak Spanish fluently like anative!
if
Such a sad sounding story with this woman client of yours. Im wondering
you could share some of what she said beyond the sexual abuse. Also howdid
you set up the constellationwho were they representing for?from
Sexual abuse is tricky Ive found. There is often some manipulation going
on
by the client. Honesty can also be questionable and it sounds like you
dont
think she said everything she needed to say.
Also, who was the perpetrator and was he in the constellation? Im asking
just to see what she said to you about her situation. They are generally
angry with mother for offering them to the perp, or for not protecting
them from the perp, but is may be difficult for the client to admit this,
but that dynamic is often presentso Id go with motherand maybe back
there.the
Please, before you all write to suggest that Im not being sensitive to
victims plightI am, but this is my experience that there is often(suggestions,
something with mother in a woman whos been sexually abused. Liz
From: ConstellationTalk@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
[mailto:ConstellationTalk@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx] On Behalf Of Julio Príncipe
Sent: Sunday, August 21, 2011 9:59 PM
To: ConstellationTalk@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Subject: [ConstellationTalk] about healing and crisis process
please)her
Dear all:
A week ago, a woman came to me for a constellation work. She was referred
by
another person (also a referred), and before our individual session, she
participated in a workshop I led.
In the interview process she talk about her family, a sexual trauma of
childhood, and also about her sons (a girl of 20s and a boy of 16; theboy
is in drugs on these days). After that, she chose to work on her"sadness".
with
A couple of days after the constellation work, she wrote me talking about
how the situation with their kids were "worst". I respond by saying that
sometimes there are crisis before healing; never happened to me before
another client, but could be. I was avalaible if she was needed me.about
Tonight, there's an e-mail in my inbox saying: "I don't want to doubt
your professionalism, but my children and I are worse and worse; tell me"a
what can we do".
At this point, I have some learnings; for example: I didn't felt she was
100% clear about her constellation "issue"; but it was clear to us that
good result" would be leave my office with more peace and quiet feelingsfirst
(what, in fact, happened).
What I think is to meet with her again, and help finding other resources.
Your comments and suggestions will be very valuable, because it's the
time I have this kind of situation with a client.
a big hug,
Julio Principe
Peru
PS.- I appreciate your understanding and apologize for my English (is not
my
first language)
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