Re: [ConstellationTalk]Spirit mind
- From: Alison Rose Levy <LevyAR@xxxxxxxxxxxxx>
- To: "ConstellationTalk@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx" <ConstellationTalk@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx>
- Date: Wed, 18 Mar 2009 15:17:34 -0400
Hi Ann and Anni:
This thread touches on something I¹ve contemplated for some time the use of
the phrase-- ³spirit-mind.²
First of all, residing in a left-brained city on the East Coast, rather than
in a more right-brain dominated location, I want to first disclose that I
practice classical constellations for three reasons:
1. I like to follow what is going on
2. I lack sufficient charisma for clients to patiently sit still for an hour,
believing that something is happening that they cannot perceive; and
3. I feel that a key component in constellations is the effect of
externalizing ones inner family picture out where others can witness it and
empathize, and that is undermined when the participants are bored or can¹t
tell what is going on which I¹ve experienced through other styles of practice
It¹s great that Hellinger continues coming up with new phrases, and people who
first encounter the work through him today and tomorrow will perhaps adopt
them without reflection. Others who lack other spiritual training may also
elect to use them. And some may simply like the phrase and choose to use it.
But for me, having trained with Hellinger in the past, and having practiced
for a few years, I have to make a conscious choice about whether a newly
introduced phrase illuminates a previously dark corner of reality, or whether
it¹s gratuitous. I must confess that from the first time I heard the phrase
³spirit-mind,² it irritated me like the sound of nails on a blackboard and
still has the same effect.
Why? I ask myself.
As a coiner of phrases myself (I¹m a professional writer), I know how
auto-intoxicated one can become by one¹s own inventions, but as a
professional, I¹ve had to be rigorous about whether or not my inventions
serve. Time and again I¹ve thrown out beloved phrases because they did not. As
a result, I guess I¹ve developed my own inner radar for determining that.
Something about the phrase ³spirit-mind² goes beep-beep-beep on that radar.
Hellinger is undoubtedly a genius at naming and coining phrases
³constellations, representatives, entanglements, I do it for you, at the full
price² and the list goes on. Even though they leave us the task of initiating
new workshop participants into their experience and meaning, think how many
dynamics are clarified by their use.
Can the same be said of ³spirit-mind?²
Many ancient paths have useful phrases that point towards the ineffable:
consciousness, soul, spirit, divinity, higher power, the way, the Tao, God,
goddess, the I am, shekhina, shakti... Modern psychology might speak of
intuition, feeling function, felt sense.
So I ask why does family constellation work require its own term? Does that
term contribute something that no one has previously identified? Or is it an
³in-phrase,² which through our adoption of it makes us special, different, or
self-signifying as belonging to this particular group? Do we want to stand
apart from our clients as having our own spiritual path integral to this form?
And if so, what path is that?
A key theme in our work is that each one of us has the right parents and that
we accept life through them. We are very sensitive about not superceding
anyone¹s parent via interposing between parent and child. But what about
peoples¹ spiritual or faith paths? Do those working this form need to adopt a
constellation specific spiritual path? Or does our work dissolve back into a
greater whole?
The Eastern paths which I¹ve studied typically offer some means for work on
one¹s ego, one¹s clinging to small self, for developing humility, or whatever
you want to call it in our work, bowing is a way to connect with humility and
smallness.
Yet inflation can be one of the occupational risks of facilitating
constellations as some feel Hellinger himself has occasionally demonstrated.
For me, if constellations are a path to knowing in a spiritual dimension, that
path is more empowered through not-naming, then through naming.
But perhaps that is just my preference, or my Jewish ancestry seeping in. It¹s
also that my own spiritual leanings are more towards the Taoist which gives
the human a place between heaven and earth. I like that place I feel I
belong there. For me, the heaven/ etheric accent of ³spirit-mind² does not
sufficiently encompass the earth, the natural, and the water-y flow that
really resonates for me. Five element theory teaches that we are made up of
all the elements. We each can choose our favorites for metaphoric use, to
heal, to image but I personally reserve the right to do that rather than
having someone else¹s preference put out for general adoption.
One of my first teachers in this work once said that: ³Anyone who interposes
themselves between you and your direct relationship to the divine is in the
way.²
A related teaching is: ³If you meet the Buddha in the road, kill him.²
For me, the knowing that representatives regularly access is plenty to digest
and convey to my clients-- without my making myself into a high priestess of
spirit-mind.
So spirit-mind--- Bang! Bang! Bang!
Alison
Dear Dan and all,
I am very interested in the questions raised in this thread. You touched on
some of my reflections after attending the training with Bert Hellinger in
Louisville in November.
I joined Constellation Talk right after that workshop. Having trained in
2006, I am still a relatively new facilitator. I am hungry to understand
more, to learn from others who have been immersed in this work, and so I
have followed all the conversations in Constellation Talk intently. But
I have been quite shy about throwing out my questions, which I fear might be
controversial, to a group of strangers. I kept hoping one of the
threads would address them directly, but this has not happened. So I guess I
am just going to have to become an active participant in the dialogue!
I did not find Hellinger's new way of working with Spirit-Mind, as presented
in Louisville, as engaging as the more structured Constellation work I was
trained in. I am wondering how many constellators are actually using this
type of work, and how many are not, and for what reasons. I have not
experienced other facililators, at the Asheville conference or elsewhere,
moving in this direction. Yet many seemed to find the Louisville
training quite powerful. Personally, while over the course of the week I
found his newer way of working led me into a more grounded, meditative
state, it also left me quite unsettled on several levels.
I understand that in this model, where the facililator barely intervenes,
the movements unfold very slowly. While in Louisville I was willing to
settle into this slower pace, because I am no stranger to "waiting for the
Spirit", it was not always clear what was unfolding. For instance, one day
Bert told us, "I am going to do a demonstration." He did not say what it
was a demonstration of. I told myself to be patient, and surely it would
become obvious by the end. When it was over, after close to two hours, and
I was still confused, I thought, "Well, now he will explain it," but he did
not. I discussed it with a few other people, and no one really seemed to
know for sure what it was that had been demonstrated. This would still have
been okay; the left brain does not necessarily have to be satisfied, but
even my right brain, with its great tolerance for ambiguity, found itself
feeling somehow cheated.
Is it possible that this Spirit-Mind work, with its lack of a clear intake,
the blindness of the representation, the lack of sentences, and the very
limited interventions by the facilitator, is so amorphous as to become
inaccessible except in quite rarified circles?
The whole question of discernment is so critical in working with various
spiritual practices. How do we know something is of the Spirit? The
traditional answer is by its fruits. In Constellation work, as in prayer,
the fruits are neither obvious nor necessarily immediate, but in my
experience there is often a sense of heightened energy, a tangible sense of
awe within the energy field of the circle. But if the experience of a
movement of the Spirit-Mind is as subjective and variable as I experienced
often in the Louisville workshop - some in the circle understanding one
thing, some another, some extraordinarily moved, others left wondering,
scratching their heads about what has just transpired, what are the criteria
for discernment?
I have trouble imagining using this approach in my workshops because I am
concerned about its erudite quality (e.g. only comprehensible to the
initiated). Nor can I use an approach that does not speak to me personally.
This does not mean that I am not deeply cognizant of, and empassioned by,
the workings of Spirit-Mind. But perhaps, as I believe Dan might have been
saying in this last thread, I recognize that we cannot operate completely in
the transcendent sphere without risking losing something of the human, and
human beings need at least some tiny modicum of the concrete, of story, to
create a context for spirtual transformation.
I did find at the workshop a minority of participants who were similarly
troubled by this new approach. It would have been wonderful to have been
able to dialogue, but there was no opportunity. So again, I would like to
know now whether others are using this "new way of working," as Bert
Hellinger calls it, or whether you are still leading more traditional
Constellations, and if so, why. I would love an honest dialogue about this.
Thank you so much.
Anne
On Wed, Mar 11, 2009 at 2:00 PM, Dan Booth Cohen <danbcohen@xxxxxxx
<mailto:danbcohen%40rcn.com> > wrote:
Sadhana -
Here again is the photo taken by my wife:
http://www.hiddensolution.com/images/ocean.jpg.
It is me and my younger daughter Rosie dipping our toes in water. The ocean
is an apt metaphor for the spirit-mind. It is vast and moves of its own
accord, carrying life, creation and destruction with it. The consciousness
of the ocean cares nothing for the fate of any particular organism.
Innumerable forms come into birth and disintegrate in death with each
passing of the Sun. To the ocean, there is no good or bad, right or wrong.
It is wonderful to come into contact with the consciousness of the ocean
spirit-mind. Still, to my wife on the beach, my daughter and I being swept
out to sea is bad and wrong; returning our toes to the sand is good and
right. Holding her hand, I dare not lose myself in the surf. That would be
bad. How can I be a husband and father without good and bad, right and
wrong?
Some go deeper. Some stay safer. Stephan Jay Gould explained that where
scientific knowledge ends, "Each of us has to have a personal metaphysics.
There are questions that are formally unanswerable on which nonetheless
every individual must take a position in order to integrate various pieces
of his life." These are personal, subjective choices. What is right for
you is right for you.
The common thread that unites the members of ConstelationTalk is we look
from a space of no thought for what has been separated. Yes, wholeness
happens. Yes, there is the healing.
Dan
-----Original Message-----
From: ConstellationTalk@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
<mailto:ConstellationTalk%40yahoogroups.com>
<ConstellationTalk%40yahoogroups.com>
[mailto:ConstellationTalk@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
<mailto:ConstellationTalk%40yahoogroups.com>
<ConstellationTalk%40yahoogroups.com>]
On Behalf Of Kay Needham
Sent: Tuesday, March 10, 2009 5:31 PM
To: ConstellationTalk@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
<mailto:ConstellationTalk%40yahoogroups.com>
<ConstellationTalk%40yahoogroups.com>
Subject: Re: [ConstellationTalk] 2 questions about the teachings of
Hellinger
Hi Dan,
Many thanks for your insights. Here are some further thoughts on healing.
Healing by definition is the process of recovery, repair and restoration or
"a return to wholeness."
For me the question is not what is there to heal? My experience of using
this question -and I used it for a very long time -is this. When I ask such
a question I have discovered that it is bound. It is bound to a plan, a
beginning,an end, an aim and a destination which would be according to me,
my mind. Because this question came first I consequently compare and assess
everything that question comes into contact with. In this I am too busy to
see, hear, feel, sense etc.
What works for me is "looking" from a space of no thought, for what has
been seperated. Embracing that, "wholeness" happens. There is the healing.
Unlike you Dan my toe is not enough in this greater spirit-mind dimension.
I aspire to set up residence not only in doing a constellation but as a way
of life. The more I dare, the deeper I go. As I learn to trust and feel
safe in these waters, I find myself shouting from the waters edge "come on
in the water's fine!"
Lots of love to you Dan Sadhana
________________________________
From: Dan Booth Cohen <danbcohen@rcn.
<mailto:danbcohen%40rcn.com<danbcohen%2540rcn.com>
<mailto:danbcohen%40rcn.com> >
com>
To: ConstellationTalk@
<mailto:ConstellationTalk%40yahoogroups.com<ConstellationTalk%2540yahoogroups
.com> <mailto:ConstellationTalk%40yahoogroups.com>
yahoogroups.com
Sent: Tuesday, March 10, 2009 11:11:25 PM
Subject: RE: [ConstellationTalk] 2 questions about the teachings of
Hellinger
Dear Mariann -
Welcome to ConstellationTalk! One of the special characteristics of our
virtual community is we encourage and tolerate a great range of diversity.
Members come from every continent, speak different mother tongues, work in
a
variety of professions, have varying degrees of experience with the
Constellation process, and embrace differing personal mythologies.
Your question opens a topic that has been sitting with me for some time. My
view is that Bert Hellinger's ideas are easily misinterpreted. Or perhaps,
they are being correctly interpreted and I disagree.
He says there is no good and bad, no right and wrong in the dimension of
the
spirit-mind. This is quite different from saying there is no good and bad,
no right and wrong. The distinction is that we do not wake-up in the
morning, commute to work, shop for groceries, call our Mums, argue with our
siblings, become annoyed with our partners, brush our teeth, and get to bed
in the dimension of the spirit-mind. Except for spiritual masters (and even
then), we live our days in the ordinary slip-slide of good and bad, right
and wrong.
When people come to me asking for a Constellation, my aim is not plant them
in transcendent harmony with the spirit-mind. If they can catch a glimpse
of it from the corner of their eye, I have done my job. They bring concrete
issues and concerns. The Constellation helps them see the possibility of a
healing movement that can unfold in the ordinary dimension of day-to-day
life and relationship. Good and bad, right and wrong are abundant in this
dimension.
What is there to heal? That is always my first question. That is my focal
point when the Constellation begins. It is the destination where the
Constellation is aimed. It is how I assess the quality of my interaction.
If I dare to step into the greater spirit-mind dimension, it is only to put
my toe in for a few moments, not to set up residence.
Others members of ConstellationTalk are on different spiritual paths and
operate from different personal mythologies. I am only speaking for myself,
not attempting to cover Bert's words with a blanket.
Good question!
Dan
-----Original Message-----
From: ConstellationTalk@ yahoogroups. com
[mailto:ConstellationTalk@ yahoogroups. com] On Behalf Of Mariann
Sent: Monday, March 09, 2009 9:16 PM
To: ConstellationTalk@ yahoogroups. com
Subject: [ConstellationTalk] 2 questions about the teachings of Hellinger
Hello,
I am a new member on this discussion group, and as such, my questions may
not fit with your topics of discussion. The only way to find out if that is
the case is by sending you my questions I pondered during the 2008 November
workshop of Bert Hellinger in Kentucky.
Bert opened his workshop by saying that "there is no good and bad, no right
and wrong" as all events have been thought out by the "intelligent mover",
the "Spirit-Mind" , and all events serve a larger picture that we cannot
comprehend. If that is the case, if there is no right and wrong, then, what
is there to heal?
Perhaps Bert answered this question on the last day of the workshop when he
talked about images, and how images create humans' reality, which are not
the same "reality" as the spirit-mind dimension. So maybe we need to heal
these broken images that make up our reality until we realize that it is OK
to leave these images behind and we dare to step into the greater
spirit-mind dimension where these hurts are no longer relevant.... What do
you think?
The second question I have is how one should conduct one's life so we won't
pass on to the next generations our burdens that will entangle those future
lives? Should this be a goal? Or am I just trying to influence something
that is beyond my control?
Please be kind to me if my questions are not within your topics.
Regards,
Mariann
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