Many years ago I came across the writings of Claude Steiner, who was
one of the original contributors to the Rescue triangle concept, and
he had some interesting things to say on it.
His formula for cooperative living was this:
No lies
No rescues
No powerplays
He defines a lie as not speaking up for what you want. So stepping
out of the victim position involves speaking up for what you want,
all of the time, knowing that you wont always get it.
No rescues means not doing too much more thatn 50% of the work. In
terms of giving and taking, this obviously means staying in a
reasonably balanced position.
No powerplays means not forcing others to do what they dont want to
do. Working by agreement.
I have found these straightfoward guides helpful to understand
stepping out of the triangle. If you are interested, I wrote a piece
on it at
http://gestalt.org.au/vinay/triang.html
Vinay
--
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Northern Rivers Gestalt Institute
15 Coleman St, Lismore,
NSW, 2480 Australia
Ph/Fax (02) 66 213 911
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Perceive all conflicts as patterns of energy seeking a harmonious
balance in a whole."
Dhyani Ywhoo, Etoway Cherokee
* GESTALT training in the Northern Rivers:
http://www.gestalt.org.au
* GANZ (Gestalt Australia And New Zealand):
http://www.ganz.org.au
* Prout - an alternative socio-economic vision:
http://www.prout.org
* Follow your life-dream - excellent support from Barbara Sher:
http://www.barbarasher.com
* Health and Healing in Cebu:
http://www.amwellness.org
* Online Gestalt course:
http://www.zurinstitute.com/gestaltcourse.html
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