Anne,
It was the issue of my adoption that drove me to my
first constellation, then with Bert as he facilitated the issue, then on to
train.
During the immersion program over many months it was often
the case that I represented adopted children. I had the impression going in
that
my connection to the family of origin was more important, more directive
in my life, though I had no outer connection to the father, mother or others in
that group. To my surprise while representing an adopted boy there was a
powerful connection to an adopted grandfather, with that boy carrying a burden
from him. It confused me at first, but did demonstrate that entanglements will
occur in both family of origin and on the adopted side. It opened me up to
more acceptance, understanding, and a sense of freedom than before regarding
my own connections to both families.
Also, during a constellation about my adopted sister with whom I'd never
felt a deep connection, the tears flowed as I thanked representatives for her
parents
for giving me a sister. It astonished how I'd never given these people even a
thought,
yet they were instrumental in my life as it had unfolded. That spontaneous
ritual
very quickly opened energy between my sister and me, and we've been more
connected, friendly, and open with each other since that day. My sister has
no idea that the constellation happened, but we both seem to have changed.
I do not know how it works, but can say that in at least some cases the adoptive
family can have this kind of influence. You may be functioning as I did with
a limited concept of what it means to be a part of the family groups. Better
for me
as the adopted child to feel those connections with love.
Does it make sense? I hope it's helpful.
My best,
Patrick McNally
________________________________
From: anne becker <annebbecker@xxxxxxxxx>
To: ConstellationTalk@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Sent: Monday, December 10, 2012 10:37 AM
Subject: [ConstellationTalk]
I have been working one-on-one with a young woman whose children were
placed in foster care by social services due to her depression, anxiety and
chaos in her home. During our first session I set up her biological family,
chiefly her mother's side. She found that very helpful, and is now
expressing a desire to work with her relationship with her adoptive
parents. She expresses that they are "chaotic" just like her biological
family. I am not sure what I can do for her. My understanding has always
been that I cannot really go back in the adoptive family's line. I have
told her this is probably the case, but she hopes to look at the present
relationship. I have had constellations done around my own adopted son,
where the birthparents were also brought in. But I am not sure how much
work I can do with the adoptive bond when the client is the adoptee. I am
interested in other people's experiences.
Thank you!
Anne Becker
Cincinnati
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