What a marvelous way to greet the New Year to read about constellation
miracles.
In my early search to connect constellation work with my intellectual and
practice background in psychotherapy, I asked Christina Essen, an
instructor at the intensive training in Munich, "how does this work fit
with psychotherapy?" She answered, "Freud knew there was a river. Jung
knew there was a river, walked to the rivers edge, but didn't stick his toe
in. Bert Hellinger has us standing in the middle of that river." I would
add that standing in the middle of the river, for some the current is swift
and insight comes quickly, for others the current moves slowly as does insight.
On the subject of psychotherapy, I am reading a book, psychotherapy without
the self: a buddist perspective by Mark Epstein. Epstein describes the
interplay between the Freudian ego (Ideal Ego) and the buddhist
de-construction of ego (ego ideal), both of which have their
limitations. Epstein also observes that without Freud there would be no
transpersonal psychology.
At the beginning of this critical year for us in the US (the election of a
new president), I have hope fueled by the energy and concerns of my fellow
citizens across the country and the positive thoughts of all of you from
around the world.
Miracles can happen,
Ellen Pillard
Reno, NV USA
At 09:53 PM 12/30/2007, you wrote:
Thanks Alan for the feedback below. I must have missed it? Busy holiday
season making a survival kit for the future etc..
Dan I wanted to add that from my experience the Clients EGO and
ATTATCHMENT to the story is very strong, so strong they don't even see or
feel the depth of what shows up in a Constellation. I think "we" as
Facilitators are out there on the skinny branches on their behalf and it is
our job to be in tune with the deeper truth which may NOT necessarily
awakened in the Clients defended perception of their conscious reality. Both
levels are valid and we serve one and they may deny one unconscious reality
over the tried and true "perceived reality" they consciously live in. The
messages form this work take root and can be quite shocking to someone in
denial of a deeper movement or truth that emerges through the
representatives. I would advise never worry about being "right"
That will keep us in a state of ego and being better etc.I had a client tell
me in the middle of her constellation that it was not her life showing up
but the lives of the representatives "acting out for a show" I told her to
wait and see for a moment as I felt her father was missing..Her symptom was
nighttime anxiety attacks and insomnia..
When I put a man in..She asked why. I "Not knowing he was dead" I asked her
about her relationship with her father He died at night when she was a young
girl..THEN she became very vaklempt and knew it was her life and that she
missed her Dad and never said goodbye. It was deeply moving and healing. I
invited her to see the parallel between her symptoms and time of death which
she didn't even see as connected until I mentioned it. Again defended
against the pain..not perceiving her inner reality (consciously) I hope this
example helps you as you clarify us Facilitators trying to catch a butterfly
with a net with BIG HOLES in it.
Blessings for 2008 and Beyond. Namaste 2 All, Gary Stuart LA, CA
<mailto:Gary%40Chifield.com>Gary@xxxxxxxxxxxx
From:
<mailto:ConstellationTalk%40yahoogroups.com>ConstellationTalk@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
[mailto:ConstellationTalk@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx] On Behalf Of Dan Booth Cohen
Sent: Sunday, December 30, 2007 7:40 PM
To:
<mailto:ConstellationTalk%40yahoogroups.com>ConstellationTalk@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Subject: [ConstellationTalk] Constellation work is a miracle. It needs to
break out of the realm of therapists
I received a voice mail on my phone two days after Christmas that has left
me both inspired and unsettled.
The back story: A woman asked me to host a circle last summer to set up a
Constellation for her and her adopted teenage daughter. This woman is a
therapist and brought her therapist with her. In the interview, she
explained that the daughter, now 15, had become depressed, withdrawn and
hostile to the point of crisis. We set up the Constellation, which went
nowhere for a long time. Finally, we had a breakthrough. I asked the
client to say a sentence. When she said it, her emotions welled-up, she
burst into tears, and reached for the daughter. I interrupted, brought in a
representative for the client's mother. I asked her to recreate the
emotional state of saying that sentence and reach for her mother instead.
This led towards a powerful healing movement with two pairs: the adopted
daughter and her mother; the adoptive mother and her mother.
The outcome: When we said our goodbyes that night, I sensed that the client
rejected the experience. What she expected was insight about her daughter's
internal emotions. She wanted to know, what was going on in there?
Instead, she received an unwelcome and unwanted experience that unwound the
ambiguity of adoption. A week afterwards, the client emailed, "I think
there wasn't enough time for the Constellation to be truly helpful."
Here I was left with the paradox that the Constellation had worked and the
client had not accepted it. Not unfamiliar to me.
We spoke by phone a couple of months afterwards. She informed me that her
daughter was doing much better in school and socially, and that the two of
them were getting along much better. Still, she reiterated that the
Constellation was off-target and hadn't helped. There was no argument from
me. In terms of my own internal state, it gnawed on me that I could provide
such a powerfully healing experience and not get the acknowledgement or
credit. Again, not unfamiliar.
The voice mail message: "I've begun to understand the message of the
Constellation in the past few months. L. has really come around. I wasn't
aware of what I needed at the time and didn't appreciate how the
Constellation helped. Our relationship is much better now and I wanted you
to know that the Constellation did help."
If I am to move towards Alan's vision of a quantum leap for the reach and
impact of Constellations, I need to re-language what I am doing. Assuming,
my experience has parallels with others, substitute "we."
This continues to be a recurring theme for me. The quality of the
Constellation experience, as Alan says, "blows the doors open." However,
the paradigm as presented is Green Eggs and Ham. Again, I am challenged to
abandon the language of therapy and discover a new vocabulary to present and
describe what the experience is.
Dan
-----Original Message-----
From:
<mailto:ConstellationTalk%40yahoogroups.com>ConstellationTalk@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
<mailto:ConstellationTalk%40yahoogroups.com>
[mailto:<mailto:ConstellationTalk%40yahoogroups.com>ConstellationTalk@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
<mailto:ConstellationTalk%40yahoogroups.com> ] On Behalf Of ALAN ROBERSON
Sent: Tuesday, December 25, 2007 8:00 PM
To:
<mailto:ConstellationTalk%40yahoogroups.com>ConstellationTalk@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
<mailto:ConstellationTalk%40yahoogroups.com>
Subject: Re: [ConstellationTalk] Indigenous Ancestral Wisdom HOPI INDIAN
Blessings + SPECIAL PARADIGM S H I F T ARTICLE BY CAROLYN BAKER
Hi Gary,
I really enjoyed your solstice message. I have two seemingly contradictory
beliefs that have developed from all of these myths and prophesies, and a
comment on the role of constellations in all of this.
First, it seems that apocalyptic thinking is hardwired into the human
subconscious. "The Evolutionary Mind" by Rupert Sheldrake , a fascinating
book, discusses this and describes a triadic movement to them all: an Edenic
beginning, the current fallen condition, and the restoration to an even
better state. I wonder if this is related to the time line of a human life,
as described in the riddle of the Sphinx: A baby (four legged creature),
crawling on all fours, in it's state of innocence. Then an adult (two legged
creature), cynical, wounded, fallen from innocence. Finally the elderly
(three legged creature, third leg is a cane), existing with both a childlike
wonder and appreciation of beauty and the wisdom of age.
Second belief--It seems to me that we are coming to a critical point in
human history. By almost any field of study, body of belief, graph, index,
you name it, human history is approaching the sharp edge of something at
breakneck speed.
Ervin Laszlo calls this "The Chaos Point", the title of his book, and dates
this in congruence to the Mayan calendar end time of winter solstice, 2012.
Less than five years away, folks.
So are we coming to an apocalypse, or is this just the human condition (the
more things change, the more they stay the same)? Perhaps the dual reality
of quantum physics tells us not to get stuck on the dilemmas, and to make a
movement forward.
Constellation work is a miracle. I was introduced to it watching Bert in
Bethesda, Maryland in the fall of 2001, and it blew the doors open to the
universe for me. I see this miracle slowly spreading, and I get the notion
that it needs to break out of the realm of therapists. As family
constellation therapy, it has been extremely helpful to my own family in a
life and death situation. In making the necessary quantum leap forward to
avert a global collapse, I see constellation work done in a variety of
fields of humanity as being one of the miracles needed.
I am liking the peace and serenity of the day around me, and feeling quietly
hopeful about things. I wish everyone the best, Alan Roberson
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