Thanks, Ellen. I am writing about Constellation almost every day and will
be for the next few months as I complete my Ph.D. dissertation. Slow as it
is, I am really enjoying the challenge of looking at the all the constituent
parts. Its an incredibly rich topic.
Still, if given a choice, I would prefer to just do the work instead of
writing about it. The experiences of those who participate in my groups
warrant it, but getting people into the groups is very difficult. Telling
them that I will take them to the bottom of a river doesnt work. Im
determined to find what does.
Dan
-----Original Message-----
From: ConstellationTalk@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
[mailto:ConstellationTalk@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx] On Behalf Of Ellen Pillard
Sent: Monday, January 07, 2008 11:44 AM
To: ConstellationTalk@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Subject: RE: [ConstellationTalk] Constellation work is a miracle. It needs
to break out of the realm of therapists
Dan, a very thoughtful observation/suggestion. I wouldn't use the Freud,
Jung, Hellinger example with clients either. For me it suggests something
of our intellectual history which ends at the river. Standing in the
middle of the river is where energy, systemic forces and other still
unknown dynamics exist as Francesca Mason suggested with her frozen river
with its unseen forces. I would add that the river also has powerful
damaging forces as I sit here just 20 miles from a breached levee that
flooded 1400 homes in Fernley, NV. The storm that caused the levee breach
left motorists stranded on highways, cut off power to northern California
for several days and isolated several desert communities from the outside
world. The ying to the storms yang is that in a month from now Death
Valley National Park, the lowest, hottest, driest place on the North
American Continent will have a once in 100 years bloom of flowers because
of the storm that brought such destruction.
I find your language very helpful and will use something very similar in my
own practice.
Ellen
At 10:36 AM 1/2/2008, you wrote:
"Freud knew there was a river. Jung knew there was a river, walked to thein
rivers edge, but didn't stick his toe in. Bert Hellinger has us standing in
the middle of that river."
"Facilitators are out there on the skinny branches."
Thanks for these pearls Ellen, (Christine Essen), and Gary. They help
crystallize my question.
First, I don't want to take away or diminish the successes we achieve. As
Gary correctly points out, we can do our jobs well even if our group
participants are overly attached to their stories. In my example, what's
most important is that the mother and daughter who were in crisis are now
a better place.participate
My question involves a smaller, less important point. Still, it is
important to me because it stands as an obstacle to expanding the reach of
Constellations in the directions that Alan suggested.
Say a person who is facing an overwhelming crisis is referred to me. She
does not know me or Constellations, but the situation is so serious and
other approaches have not worked.
She asks, "Tell me about what you do, so I can decide whether to
in your circle."reconciliation
I can answer,
A) I use a creative European approach for fostering peace and
in difficult relationships. Best known as a Systemic<http://www.hiddensolution.com/constellation%20description.html>
<<http://www.hiddenso
Constellation, this gentle, nearly-silent group process transformsthe
emotional, physical or relationship problems. A Constellation circle is
neither psychotherapy nor a spiritual practice.
Or B) Freud knew there was a river. Jung knew there was a river, walked to
the river's edge, but didn't stick his toe in. I'll have you standing in
middle of that river.herself
Implied in this metaphor, is the promise that she won't drown or be swept
away in it. It begs the question: Standing on what in the middle of the
river? If Freud didn't and Jung didn't, why should she trust plunging in
with me?
The first answer is slightly more inviting, but leaves her quite unprepared
for the actual experience. The second answer is more revealing about the
experience of Constellations, but will people agree to it?
This is not simply about what to write on our fliers and websites. The
adoptive mother in my case example did not know what she was getting
into. Perhaps if she had been better prepared - if my description had been
more clear and accurate - it would not have taken 6 months for her to come
around to appreciating it.
The lack of a good vocabulary for describing what a Constellation is holds
back the advancement of the work along the lines that Alan envisions. Let's
keep working on it and sharing our successes and those dreaded "learning
lessons."
The Change Dancer
Dan
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