I also want to thank you Thomas for your offerings on this subject. I gained
from it both intellectually and in the heart space. I continue in appreciation,
gratefulness, and my own enrichment from being in this community of
constellation talk, Rita Martino
Warm Regards,
Rita Ann Martino
Website: Awakeningfamilyconstellations.com
"When we have passed a certain age, the soul of the child we were and the
souls of the dead from whom we have sprung come to lavish on us their riches
and their spells." -Marcel Proust (In Search of Lost Time)
________________________________
From: Stephen Campbell <coachuno@xxxxxxxxx>
To: ConstellationTalk@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Sent: Thu, April 15, 2010 7:13:34 AM
Subject: Re: [ConstellationTalk] Orders of Love revisited - bowing
Thomas,
Thank you!!
This is a very thoughtful and thought provoking piece and one I shall need
to re-read several times and contemplate and digest its content.
Fondly,
Stephen
On Thu, Apr 15, 2010 at 01:47, Thomas Bryson <tb@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx> wrote:
The deeper purpose of bowing has nothing to do with recognition,
acceptance or acknowledgment of the other. It is an inner process for
the one who is bowing. It is a movement back into ourselves that
precedes a genuine encounter with the other. When we take a breath,
exhale and bow, we take a moment for ourselves alone, to move into our
own field.
The so called 'orders of love' are an expression of the collective field
of the pack within which humans live. We are constantly in the fields of
others and through generations of conditioning for survival, have
learned to identify with these fields. We unconsciously define who we
are by our relationships. That blind identification with the 'orders of
love' is the ego. This is the 'me' which we think we are. That
conditioned 'me' is the trance that we are in and from which we may
through grace awaken.
When we bow, we move out of the other person's trance and into our own
field. It is a movement out of the conditioned 'orders of love' and into
simple presence. To learn that we are that unconditioned presence is the
essence of the spiritual search. Our own field is the space we find in
meditation or in solitude. For instance, when Jesus spent 40 days alone
in the desert, he found his own field - and learned that his field and
the field of God were the same! That presence is love. It isn't personal
and it isn't conditioned. It is the same for everyone, even though each
person's expression of it is completely unique.
That presence is what the child is looking for from the parents. When
that is not reflected back to the child, the child's deepest sense of
Self stays unknown and the search may become rooted. When the field of
the parents is too violent or when what is coming through the parents is
overwhelming, the child turns away. In effect, the child bows to find
his or her own field. It is the right thing for the child to do. If the
child doesn't find presence, he or she may spend his or her whole life
searching; becoming competent, polite, intelligent and skilled. These
are the clients we see who have spent a lifetime in therapy, yoga,
spiritual retreats, esoteric understandings of the universe or
constellation workshops etc. But, there is still the longing for
connection with the deepest self - the deepest self that can be found in
one simple bow.
When we bow, we separate from the field of the other to go into our own
space. Our own space, without the conditioning of the 'orders of love,'
is simple presence, love, consciousness itself. From this place that we
all know, we can have a real encounter with the other from the place of
presence. Then we can see, acknowledge and accept the other. The self
sees the self in the context of presence, as presence.
All love,
Thomas Bryson
Facilitation, training and counseling by Skype
tb@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx <tb%40thomas-bryson.de>
