Thanks for this Chris. As I was re-reading my post, I realized that it sounded
a bit more definitive than I really felt. As in most transpersonal contexts,
the paradoxical is present, and I find the best facilitators are ones who can
hold a both/and.
So, yes, the Field isn’t magical and doesn’t care about outcomes, and we need
to bring our expertise to make sure that there are useful outcomes…
AND, something holds and guides us and cares a great deal, and love flows in
the work and it’s not all up to us.
;-)
The Rev. Leslie Nipps
NLP & Family Constellations Practitioner
“Trust as a Way of Life…”
leslie@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Co-Director, 2015 North American Systemic Constellations Conference in San
Diego on November 12-15.
Visit ConstellateUs.com/conference2015 for more information
On Apr 21, 2015, at 6:55 AM, Chris Walsh chris@xxxxxxxxxxxxx
[ConstellationTalk] <ConstellationTalk@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx> wrote:
Dear Leslie
You say that when a client states what they want from a constellation you may
ask them the question:
"And what would having that do for you?”
What a great clarifying question of intention!
Too often have I seen constellations conducted with very little clarity about
the issue and I don't think the benignly indifferent field really cares enough
to make it useful for the client. Moreover the client walks away with no clear
anchor to relate their constellation experience to their ongoing daily life. I
am going to dare to express the controversial view (almost a heresy) that the
handing over of all to some great wise field that actually cares about the
welfare of an specific individual is a naive excuse for laziness and lack of
skill.
Yes the field is clearly a knowing field. It reveals previously invisible
information. It can be healing when the elements of a constellation are
properly aligned by having a clearly defined issue, a solution focus and an
understanding of healthy order. Harald Hohnen, who watched Bert Hellinger a lot
and assisted him as he developed movements of the soul, observed that
constellations done only with movements of the soul, without working with these
other elements, (issue, solution focus and order) only display the issue
clearly but don't lead to real resolution or healing - and he was talking about
constellations led by the master himself. If the facilitator and the client are
both clear that is what they want then that is okay. However if the client
comes for healing and the facilitator's flyers, website and talks all are about
healing, then I believe it is false advertising if the facilitator's practice
is only focused only on revealing.
So thank you again Leslie for your clarifying question and like many others in
this forum for contributing something practical that brings more quality into
our professional practice.
Cheers
Chris Walsh
Melbourne, Australia
ph +61 (0)3 9487 4647
www.cwalsh.com.au
On Tue, Apr 21, 2015 at 5:48 AM, Leslie Nipps lnipps@xxxxxxxxx
[ConstellationTalk] <ConstellationTalk@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx> wrote:
Thanks for this conversation about “intention.” I have to admit some occasional
frustration with the larger conversation, because it usually takes a while for
me to track what aspect of intention we’re talking about. What about the
“intention” of assigning a representative to the role of the mother? Intention
is all over the place in constellations. ;-)
Having said that, I want to respond to the specific type of intention named in
Alison’s post, which in NLP is called the “outcome.” There’s a lovely set of
questions in NLP called the “meta outcome” questions. In response to the
client’s answer to the first question which is “What would you like?” the
response from the practitioner is: “That’s terrific. And what would having that
do for you?” (This can be repeated several times.) This allows for some
meaningful exploration of the consciously named outcome. The process either
solidifies for both client and practitioner the originally-stated outcome, or
it leads to a useful conversation about what might really be the truest desire
for the client. I often wish FC practitioners had this simple and elegant tool,
because it would help focus the work on what is truly at the heart of the
client’s heart.
Having said that, I generally find that the Field works with even the most
limited, unusefully-stated outcomes so that the resulting outcome is most
beneficial and (often unconsciously) wanted by the client. I’m sure we’ve all
seen that. So, I tend to trust the Field to work with our limited human knowing
about what’s good for us. ;-)
Peace, Leslie
The Rev. Leslie Nipps
NLP & Family Constellations Practitioner
“Trust as a Way of Life…”
leslie@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Co-Director, 2015 North American Systemic Constellations Conference in San
Diego on November 12-15.
Visit ConstellateUs.com/conference2015 for more information
On Apr 20, 2015, at 3:53 AM, Alison Fornes maitreya71@xxxxxxxxx
[ConstellationTalk] <ConstellationTalk@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx> wrote:
Dear Community,
Thanks for this conversation about intention.
I understand and appreciate the thoughts about intention. In practice, I would
say that I probably hear the intention in the same way that I watch where
representatives are placed: as a information that the seeker is providing me
about the system.
Having said that, I don't know if that's appropriate. For why would I, as a
human facilitator, have any clearer line to the greater intent than the client
herself?
I am in an argument with myself here. For my response is that because my
intention is to have a perspective that is broader than the seeker and align
myself with the greater movement.
I understood when Chris wrote a while back about being clear with the client
(and ourselves!) about our position as a facilitator. If they come to us with
an intention, is it not also our place to be clear with them about our own
intention? Shall I say to them, "Thanks for telling me your intention, now I
will decide for myself whether to follow it."
Perhaps more honest to say, "hmm, I don't know if we shall meet that intention,
but from my place as facilitator, with the insight available to me, my
intention is to listen deeply and do the best that I can to bring ease."
That really is my intention: to shift the constriction in the field into
greater ease/flow.
I continue to feel a tension here-but honestly, I think that is between my
intellect or perhaps ego and my heart. Alison wants to heal, but when I'm in
the field, Seeing and not forcing "healing" is always where my heart leads.
--
It is the courageous heart that loves. It is the loving heart that heals.
alisonfornes.com
