It's okay to say, "You are right. I cannot help you." Say it clearly,
kindly, gently. Be sure you are comfortable with that statement, as she
will read you. If you want her to heal more than she wants to heal,
nothing will work.
Making suggestions to such a one is hazardous at best. After you admit
there is nothing you can do, see what happens. She may actually have
something in mind to suggest to you.
Barbara
On 10/8/2020 6:54 PM, 'drmdressler@xxxxxxxxx' drmdressler@xxxxxxxxx
[ConstellationTalk] wrote:
Hi Elmar,
My guess is that she is right. Nothing worked for her and all suggestions were useless. Some may consider that she in fact does have connection to feelings - called anger, but clearly she does not feel understood. So maybe it is time to just be with her without suggestions and advice. Not easy when we feel compelled to do things to avoid feeling powerless.
Best wishes,
Monika
On Friday, October 9, 2020, 09:52:47 AM GMT+11, Elmar Dornberger elmar@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx [ConstellationTalk] <constellationtalk@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx> wrote:
I am wondering if anyone has worked with a highly traumatizes person.
The trauma stems from early childhood abuse by a narcissistic mother and an absent father. This person has no connections to feelings and sensations. All her reactions are either emotional flooding or anger.
She has gone to a massage therapist for 3 years and would feel exactly the same after every treatment as before.
She was her mother's slave, cooking, cleaning, caretaking, etc. She had no friends and never developed a sense of herself. She is successful in business working with numbers. What she wants is a family live. Anything I suggest or do with her she rejects or claims she has done (everything) before and nothing works.
I am not a beginner at this I am a Psychotherapist and a Constellation Facilitator for over 20 years, and yet this is a new situation.
Yours,
Elmar
