No but I do remember him saying he preferred 'sinners'!! He was talking to a
young woman and saying; "You're a little too nice for me." Then he suggested
she stand at the edge of the stage and yell: I hate you at the audience.
She said she felt great afterwards!!
Best wishes
Barbara
Sent from my iPhone
On 8 Jun 2017, at 13:16, 'Eimear O'Neill' eimear@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
[ConstellationTalk] <ConstellationTalk@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx> wrote:
I don't suppose Hellinger used that good Irish saying "No good deed goes
unpunished!" Irony aside, self-sacrificing mothers can demand/command loyalty
in family systems that covers up their own transgenerational traumas passed
on to the next generation... especially if the mother (or father) has put
aside their own health, well-being, healing, leaving a relationship and
dealing with composting their own muck, "for the children's sake". Unspoken
resentment, inappropriate expectations and projections, rigid moral
imperatives about sexuality backed by divine right,.. you can all imagine the
list of more obvious 'punishments'.
In this particular case, I'd be interested in at least leaving space for the
transgenerational trauma on both sides.. From an earlier extensive and
well-respected national survey here in Canada (Badgley Report) it's one in
two of girls under 14 who have had some exposure to the continuum of sexual
abuse (almost all of it by men) and one in three of boys (almost all by
men)... That number appears to have dropped by the 2014 Community Health
Survey.. however that smaller survey left out indigenous populations where
the rate of sexual abuse for girls is 8 out of 10, 6 out of 10 for boys.
One conclusion is that most 'saints' would have had exposure to early
childhood sexual abuse, however that was handled. These numbers also
underline the critical importance of dealing with men's sexual responses and
traumatic re-enactments in relation to children, transgenerationaly. Bruce's
post reveals how systemic constellations work can contribute in that.
Warmly
Eimear
Eimear O'Neill PhD
www.eimearoneill.com
‘If we surrendered/ to earth’s intelligence, we could rise up rooted, like
trees."Rainer Maria Rilke:
On 8 June 2017 at 00:48, Anngwyn anngwyn@xxxxxxx [ConstellationTalk]
<ConstellationTalk@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx> wrote:
Greetings from Budapest,
Years ago I seem to remember Hellinger saying something
interesting and important about parents who are regarded as "saints" but I
cannot remember what that was. Does anyone have that information ?
Warm Regards
Anngwyn St. Just Ph.D
www.acst-international.com
http://anngwyn.wisrville.org
