Hi all
One of the best researchers on shame is Sylvan Tomkins. You can go to the
Tomlins Institute website.
Also Nathanson’s Shame Pride and the Birth of the Self
From: ConstellationTalk@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
[mailto:ConstellationTalk@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx] ;
Sent: Monday, March 14, 2016 5:08 PM
To: ConstellationTalk@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Subject: Re: [ConstellationTalk] Shame
Hi Vinay and all,
There is a great in depth research by Brene Brown, PhD, researcher (Social
work), and storyteller. Her research started with the topic ‘Connection’ and
right in the very beginning of the study she discovered that there is something
that unravels connection. On further examination she could tell that this
something was ’Shame’.
Brene describes it all in her book ’Daring Greatly’. Her TedTalk The Power of
Vulnerability’ can give you a first impression of her research. There is a
longer youtube series (https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uCwsGlMVbZE), in case
you wanna dive in deeper, it is worth it. She talks about vulnerability, guilt
versus shame (guilt-I did something wrong, shame-I am wrong), coping
mechanisms, trauma and much more.
I find it to be an easy and fun listening with lots of examples.
These are such fundamental findings, which I believe to be universal, that they
can be applied to any culture to a major degree. Probably good for any
facilitator, with a background in psychotherapy/psychology or not.
Enjoy,
Verena
On Mon, Mar 14, 2016 at 7:56 AM, Steve Vinay Gunther spirited@xxxxxxxxxxxx
[ConstellationTalk] <ConstellationTalk@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxx> wrote:
Hey folks
I wanted to raise a professional issue.
There are many different styles of constellation facilitation. From one point
of view, they are all welcome.
At the same time, I wonder how people feel about facilitation which utilises
shame.
Especially in the 60’s and 70’s, many forms of therapy used a confrontative
type of approach to get people to some core truths, and jolt them out of their
less functional patterns of communication.
In this century, a lot of therapies have moved towards a more ‘relational’
approach, which often is informed by current understanding of the effect of
shame, and the importance of understanding this in a therapeutic or teaching
type of interaction.
However, there are constellation facilitators who are not therapists, and
perhaps do not see Constellation work as necessarily needing to reference
therapy theory or practices. And constellation facilitators from different
cultures have different views on how to move people through their process; some
cultural styles may be more ‘robust’.
This is not just an abstract question. There are examples where facilitators
use confrontative encounters in a constellation context.
I am interested in how others see this, and to what degree there may be
culturally based views operating in our underlying assumptions about matters
such as this. For those who dont see constellations as necessarily having to
reference the world of psychotherapy, then what are the views about the use of
shame.
I reflect on these things, as most of my constellation work is done in Asian
cultures. On the one hand there is a particular kind of sensitivity to shame.
But in other ways, attitudes differ from the west regarding teaching, as
Confucian style approaches are traditionally more vertical. At the same time,
my understanding of shame is that it is a universally experienced social
emotion, which is not generally helpful in learning contexts.
Vinay
--
Carpe diem!
Verena Giebels
Certified Cranio-Sacral Practitioner
Licensed Massage Practitioner
Family Constellations Facilitator
(001) 360 421 6296
1330 S 2nd St, Ste 103, Mt Vernon, WA
<http://www.bodysoulhealing.abmp.com/> www.bodysoulhealing.abmp.com
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